Thursday Thirteen – The Lunchtruck Strikes Back
|Thirteen Things I’m Asking Myself This Morning
1. Why the hell do the Hockey Gods hate my team so much? I mean, we’ve lost our Number 1 goalie, our Number 1 defenceman, our main scorer is about as effective as handles on a wet paper bag, and our hulking power forward is playing out on the periphery so much he might as well be in the front row munching on popcorn!
2. Why, oh why, did I fall asleep on the couch last night when I was supposed to be studying for my Detailing test today? Now I’m all panic-y that I’m going to suck and fail, even though the quiz is only worth about 2% of my final mark – I hate to suck at anything.
3. Why is it that we had a meeting with our VP about the general incompetence of our main receptionist about nine months ago, and it was agreed at that time that we’d can her once my sales partner got back from vacation, but she’s still here?
4. Is it normal to feel guilt over the fact that my father wants us desperately to become part of his car club, to the point where he’s basically going to give us a vintage MG, but neither of us really like most of the people in the club and can’t really reconcile taking on a second oil-spewing ozone-depleting vehicle in line with our environmental views?
5. And why is it that the moment a decision is made to eat better, the body gets an overwhelming craving for McD’s?
6. How much longer can I pull the wool over people’s eyes at work and have them believe that I’m actually busy, when in reality I spend most of my time looking at the clock and watching my life slowly tick by one minute at a time?
7. Why is it, at the ripe old age of 34, that I still get zits the size of small European countries?
8. Do I stay with the program after I finish my certification and go for the full meal deal thus finishing sometime around my 40th birthday, or do I take the credentials I have once I finish in the fall, go into business for myself and pursue other interests as well? And if I stay with the program, do I stick at it in Vancouver, or pack up and head to Vermilion, AB for a year worth of college in the middle of nowhere?
9. Why is it that everyone else around my age seems to be so goddamn successful and have their shit together while Cin and I are still flailing around trying to figure out what we want to do when we grow up?
10. Why is my cat being such a little bastard lately?
11. Why is that certain groups seem to think that freedom of speech only applies to those who agree with their particular viewpoint on the world, human rights, social issues, etc.?
12. Why is it that my entire family seems to think that we can drop everything and attend any and all family functions/dinners/what-have-you, provided that they give us 24 hours notice?
13. How do you diplomatically tell your best friend that ever since his girlfriend left him, he’s become a bit of a schmuck?
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